Help them blow!

[Tring Tring]
“Thank you for not TARGETING us but CALLING us. How may I help you?”

“You constipated ass hole, will blow your appendix, if your don't tell why my BMW didn’t blew into pieces?

“Sure sir I would help you blow, however to assist you further would you please whisper your code number registered with us?”

[Caller confirms]

“Thank you for successful release of your information; may I know where you wanted to blow up?”

“You empty strip of crocin…What difference does that make?”

“You need to understand sir… there are so many cars that are getting ready to blow up at so many places. We have to understand the wind, the outside temperature, the type of bomb you made, brains of the holy idiot who inspired you to make this bomb… etc sir?”

“You product of a failed pill… do you realize my 250 liters of gasoline, 150 meters of wire.. 50 kilos of nails, one mobile phone and one syringe have gone waste?”

“Syringe????”

“Yes. What else do you expect from me. Mate listen I am also as fucked up as you. Studied something and doing its opposite. What else do you expect if a doc makes the bomb?”

“Got it sir. Remove the car from the parking, uninstall the bomb, reinstall it and this time use dynamite and not the fucking syringe”

[Click]

Brilliant isn’t it. Much before any intelligent outsourcing happened to us, we were outsourced terror. And here we are today producing one of the brilliant brains in the world of terror. Name it and we can blow it. Don’t worry about who and how. Don’t bother about those satellites watching from which ever sphere. Plane, train, car or cooker… just pay us we can blow anything at any place!

It’s an industry. Let’s make money out of it too. Terror call center would be a perfect idea. Millions of graduates, who dint have luck to become anything else, can mint a fortune with us. Naah we are not spoiling their future. They never had it in the first place.

Supporting doesn’t amount to bombing. And yes it’s for sure safer than making and triggering one. And don’t miss the overseas trips for training. From Kandahar to Kashmir, Arial view of New York to hidden depths of London Tubes, Crowded locals of Mumbai to open desserts of Egypt, various Mosques and Temples… now who can ignore a global profile?

And come on you aren’t supporting bunch of morons. They may not know what they are doing. Unfortunately they may not even live longer to master their passion. But still they have an enviable literate past. Doctors, pilots, lawyers, engineers…! Like them, you needn’t believe, practice, preach, defame Allah. Do it in the name of Moolah.

Hell as I put up this blog I see a bunch of uniformed men swooping into my place. I read their identity as MI-5, CIA, Mossad. This paranoid caucus of idiots wants to kill any idea of outsourcing to our lands. But I liked the man who winked and gave me a MoU to sign.

The letter head reads ISI.